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May 23, 2012

JAMES WARD: I LIKE BORING THINGS

It started in Marks & Spencer.

I’d gone in to buy a sandwich (it was lunchtime). I walked over to the chiller cabinet and saw this:

pork pie

I immediately walked out.

Things got worse. After tweeting about this monstrosity, someone sent me this:

Stop trying to make everything a sandwich, Marks & Spencer, you lunatics. A pork pie doesn’t belong in a sandwich, neither do Yorkshire puddings. Just leave them alone. And don’t put these insane creations in wrappers covered in Union Jack bunting, suggesting some sense of tradition and nostalgia. There is no widely held tradition in this county of putting pies in sandwiches.

I wasn’t entirely sure what a “Jubilee strawberry” was, but as Nick Marston on the Berry Gardens website explains, the Driscoll Jubilee is:

an exceptional strawberry with a wonderful naturally sweet flavour profile. It literally is the Queen of the Crop when it comes to summer…

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